Lord Grantham - A Rags to Riches Story

Five days ago, Lord Grantham and his pal Nicolas Cage found themselves in a pickle. I dropped them both into Snake's tank. That's right, Snake, a murderer of more than 100 mice. 

Snake hadn't eaten in more than three weeks, so I figured Lord Grantham and Nicolas Cage would be gone within an hour. To my surprise, both survived a long, arduous evening, hiding under Snake's shelter, huddled together. They even used Snake's old skin, to both hide themselves and keep warm.

The next day, Nicolas Cage ventured out and was promptly eaten by Snake. (If only that could happen to the real Nicolas Cage.) Lord Grantham was undeterred. He climbed to the top of Snake's tree branch and proclaimed himself victor of the Hunger Games.

For five days and five nights Lord Grantham survived - his reward...

That's right. Lord Grantham is now part of the family. The odds are ever in his favor.